You’re just at the edge of the abyss, it goes so much deeper, dare you heed the call of the depths

Oh Argumate, you innocent nocturnal predatory bird, I am far from innocent myself, but there is a reason I hold my own cards close to my chest.  Some things should be tolerated but not celebrated.  Some things should be secret.

“Oh my goodness” is an affectation. :)

Edit: special note: the secret is not cuckolding, in case you read this as implying so, gentle readers.