In the future, all men are women.
“Hilarious! Wisconsin Man Buries Nazi in Pile of Cheese”
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Tags Now:
#the iron hand - the State
#the invisible fist - Capitalism
#the red hammer - Communism
#thx xhxhxhx - you know who you are @xhxhxhx
#chronofelony - time travel
#mitigated future - futurism
#art+#oc - hand-made, free-range, gluten-free, organic, locally-sourced PNGs
#shtpost - quality, 100% serious post, always repost this
#politics - elaborate joke post, never repost this
#trump cw - self-filter tag for anti-memeist bigots who are prejudiced against our first Meme-American President due to the orange color of his skin
#discourse preview 2019 - retrocausal posts from the New Mexico Timeline
#nationalism - posts banned under the 2089 Human Dignity Act of the Earth Sphere Federation, filtering these is recommended for normies and anyone who isn’t a NatSep
#augmented reality break - (alternate (reality) break) tag intersection, but with coffee so it’s better and therefore augmented (like me)
Future Tags (Vegas Timeline):
#this week on woke or broke - exciting new youtube show in which contestants try to guess what is social justice orthodoxy and what was cooked up by the producers. failing contestants are fired from their jobs
#miti draws dallas - performance art piece in which thousands of teleoperated drones are released in a swarm over Dallas, Texas, and pictures of frightened and heavily-armed Texans are posted to Tumblr in five minute intervals
#super love love demon battle - SLLDB fandom drama. eventually boils over into discussion of the SLLDB fandom murders
#HobbesWasRight - series of articles laying out the philosophical groundwork for Googlezon Dynamics’ Leviathan Project and its benefits for the security of the state and the populace
#dogs - dog photos and canine cybernetic augmentations. also ferrets, to go with the ferret mistagging fad
#national technocracy - hypothetical point within the N-dimensional ideospace lattice originally theorized by RAND Geospatial Dynamics Working Group in the 1950s, generally summarized as “that thing that comes after prediction markets”, many researchers dispute whether it can actually exist. abandoned by Silicon Valley CEOs in favor of a system based on Facebook likes.
#dogfree - actual dog photos, just dog photos
Future Tags (Montana Timeline):
No tags for this timeline, possibly unstable. Radsuit suggested.
Anonymous asked:
Want some extra fun? Christian here who subscribes both to annihilationism (IE, the "hell = nonexistence" doctrine you're describing) *and* quantum immortality; I call this combination quantum universalism.
While many futurists anticipated broad advances across the technological economy, in fields ranging from computing to materials science, few foresaw the radical advancements in theology that advanced quantum theory would bring.
- The Quantum Fields of God, Ned Halibut, Kansas Revival Timeline, 2308 (retrieved from Church of Mars archives 2609 with permission of Father Gregory)
The year is 2095…
Following final victory of the Good Feminist People in the Great Gamer War, the old archetype of Man has been abolished.
Seeking to end sexual oppression, and empowered by novel tissue engineering techniques, the possession of a penis is limited to only those who can prove they are sufficiently Woke, enforced by a powerful licensing agency.
In practice, those with power in the corrupt government are those who can ensure their license remains in effect, no matter what crimes they commit. These same patterns of abuse are used to justify the licensing regime, while leaving social and financial power unexamined.
David Florence’s license has just been revoked.
Tags Now:
#the iron hand - the State
#the invisible fist - Capitalism
#the red hammer - Communism
#thx xhxhxhx - you know who you are @xhxhxhx
#chronofelony - time travel
#mitigated future - futurism
#art+#oc - hand-made, free-range, gluten-free, organic, locally-sourced PNGs
#shtpost - quality, 100% serious post, always repost this
#politics - elaborate joke post, never repost this
#trump cw - self-filter tag for anti-memeist bigots who are prejudiced against our first Meme-American President due to the orange color of his skin
#discourse preview 2019 - retrocausal posts from the New Mexico Timeline
#nationalism - posts banned under the 2089 Human Dignity Act of the Earth Sphere Federation, filtering these is recommended for normies and anyone who isn’t a NatSep
#augmented reality break - (alternate (reality) break) tag intersection, but with coffee so it’s better and therefore augmented (like me)
Future Tags (Vegas Timeline):
#this week on woke or broke - exciting new youtube show in which contestants try to guess what is social justice orthodoxy and what was cooked up by the producers. failing contestants are fired from their jobs
#miti draws dallas - performance art piece in which thousands of teleoperated drones are released in a swarm over Dallas, Texas, and pictures of frightened and heavily-armed Texans are posted to Tumblr in five minute intervals
#super love love demon battle - SLLDB fandom drama. eventually boils over into discussion of the SLLDB fandom murders
#HobbesWasRight - series of articles laying out the philosophical groundwork for Googlezon Dynamics’ Leviathan Project and its benefits for the security of the state and the populace
#dogs - dog photos and canine cybernetic augmentations. also ferrets, to go with the ferret mistagging fad
#national technocracy - hypothetical point within the N-dimensional ideospace lattice originally theorized by RAND Geospatial Dynamics Working Group in the 1950s, generally summarized as “that thing that comes after prediction markets”, many researchers dispute whether it can actually exist. abandoned by Silicon Valley CEOs in favor of a system based on Facebook likes.
#dogfree - actual dog photos, just dog photos
Future Tags (Montana Timeline):
No tags for this timeline, possibly unstable. Radsuit suggested.
New Tags:
#the mitigated exhibition - collection of 2-dimensional pixel arrays hand-crafted by Tibetan space monks (according to product packaging)
#one thousand villages - militarized bus maps and civil defense planning for the city of Springrock, Arkowa
#urban planning - development plans for Hypersuburb One
#gendpol - (exploration of) Neurotype Space with Social Characteristics
#racepol - unsuspecting visitors are painted exciting new colours in this avant-garde art installation
#otv game - greyskin politics discussion tag
#私 - 自分がない。
#ミチは日本語を話します。 - Non-existent post category. Forget you ever saw this.
#this is a joke - leaked document from the Trump Administration, forward to WaPo & HuffBuzz
#the year is - descriptions for movies retroactively deleted from the timestream
#flagpost - stealth post, only you can see it (yes you, specifically)
Future Tags (Boston Timeline):
#orly - series of interviews with rogue VN AI Orliana Reilly
#owlpocalypse2k18 - Melbourne comes to a halt as experimental Google mosquito suppression project causes owl duplication glitch and residents are lagged off of the server
#the coming mouse utopia - new tag originates following dramatic shift in Alt Right interests towards mouse ethnostate, surprising all observers (except me)
#baka baka baka - flagging tag for bot which prints out all mitigated chaos Tumblr posts and air drops them inside the US Congress building
> in which the supposed conservative trads use transhuman technology to create a world with only men and traps, sending the low-IQ plebs to perform simulated coal mining in augmented reality while Victorian aesthetics are maintained
Basically don’t call people “cucks“. Don’t be surprised when people react badly to being called “cucks“. Don’t try to reclaim “cuck“ by telling other people that being cuckolded is a good thing.
multiheaded1793 said: I feel cucked by this post.
the battle will be lost when cuck replaces fag as the generic disparagement term of choice for 15 year old boys.
By the year 2035, it is common slang for “acting against one’s own self-interest”. Puffed up thinkpiece writers write on the virtue of enviro-cuckism and a hundred other causes.
on whatever has replaced Tumblr, debates still rage over whether it’s okay for anyone to use this reclaimed slur, or if you have to be a cuck yourself.
This discussion intensifies following the release of the first cuckbot, which exists solely to raise male status by getting cucked. Female cuckbots for women are soon released. Sales of conventional sex robots dwindle.
Just so you know, we haven’t hit the weirdest part of the timeline yet, where brain scanning technology is used to download tulpas from people’s brains into waiting android bodies.
That is, of course, before they start going insane and homicidal, but the brief moment between culture shock and sci-fi horror is interesting to say the least.
I look forward to the day that we use vines instead of emojis
it’s the logical progression
well, shit.
In the future, software on our phones will automatically analyze our most recent selfie and convert it to scalable vector graphic renderings of our faces, then adjust them to fit the standardized unicode facial character morphs using specialized neural networks.
Except for me. There will only be one photo on my phone, incorrectly meta-tagged as a selfie.
JAPANESE PRIME MINISTER
SHINZO ABE!
SAN FRANCISCO—In an effort to reduce the number of unprovoked hostile communications on the social media platform, Twitter announced Monday that it had added a red X-mark feature verifying users who are in fact perfectly okay to harass. “This new verification system offers users a simple, efficient way to determine which accounts belong to total pieces of shit whom you should have no qualms about tormenting to your heart’s desire,” said spokesperson Elizabeth James, adding that the small red symbol signifies that Twitter has officially confirmed the identity of a loathsome person who deserves the worst abuse imaginable and who will deliberately have their Mute, Block, and Report options disabled. “When a user sees this symbol, they know they’re dealing with a real asshole who has richly earned whatever mistreatment they receive, including profanity, body-shaming, leaking of personal information, and relentless goading to commit suicide. It’s really just a helpful way of saying to our users, ‘This fuck has it coming, so do your worst with a clear conscience and without fear of having your account suspended.’” At press time, Twitter reassuredly clarified that the red X was just a suggestion and that all users could still be bullied with as little recourse as they are now.