“men and women have statistically different preferences” is a statement universally acknowledged and incredibly controversial at the same time
probably the dissonance is resolved by carefully distinguishing actual men and women (who have statistically differing preferences due to existing in this fallen world and being shaped and moulded by society into the twisted creations that we see all around us) and the Platonic ideal of men and women, who are equal in every way and have identical preferences and behaviour at a statistical level.
admission time: I think that some of the gender forbidden shadowspeech is probably true for a sizeable chunk, once you’ve removed the lesbians, the gays, the bisexuals, transgender individuals, queers, asexuals, autistics, adhders, those with PCOS… basically anyone who has a good reason that they might differ from main plan. (as many as 1/5th of women may have PCOS for instance - not a trivial number)