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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

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Anonymous asked:

But Miti, how are your anons supposed to optimize our asks for creepiness and/or offensiveness if we don't know your race and gender? Won't you think of the anons?

Ugggh.  Who do you think you are, Google?

Come back when you’re a multinational corporation physically embodying the threat of a societal panopticon in order to more efficiently sell Authentic™ skinny mom jeans to hipsters, loser.

anons asks shtpost this is a joke

[soon your askbox would be full of shitpost asks like Argumate’s and] you’d be tempted to make an ms paint collage for every single one.

This television show blog doesn’t have that kind of animation drawing budget.

But don’t worry.  Most anons on this blog do not get a Full Custom™ MS Paint.JPG for their asks.  It’s just the rate of images per ask that would reduce.

anons asks shtpost

Anonymous asked:

Do you truly think anyone is going to buy your nationalist hogwash? You blithering buffon, the dual monachy will never succumb to such seditious sentiment! AEIOU!

A monarch is nothing more than the crown jewel worn by the State.

Dual Monachy?  I’ve got anons inventing entirely new forms of government right here in my askbox.

anons asks shtpost

But yeah, I probably missed an ask some time in the last 9 hours, so if you sent one, you can send it again.

Also if you didn’t send one you can send one anyway.  I tend to leave my askbox out in the open where just anyone could stuff asks in it.

anons asks

Anonymous asked:

Hating men for no reason won't solve your personal problems

I was really expecting to be accused of misogyny, actually.  I’m trying to calculate how many levels of misdirection this ask is on.

Maybe it’s about this post?

They can’t undo Toxic Masculinity, because they don’t understand Masculinity, and they don’t want to.

…because that would mean understanding things about themselves that they don’t want to understand, either.

In which the “they” is actually Mainstream Feminists.

Patterns of male behavior are in part driven by what straight women like/don’t like, or more accurately who they treat as hot/not hot, who they date/don’t date, etc.

Undoing what the Mainstream Feminists call “toxic masculinity” would mean that straight women, on average, would have to change, which would mean they’d have to first understand how cishet female preferences shape the very male power/dominance/status hierarchies they ostensibly oppose.

However, Feminism does poorly at attributing agency and power to women (beyond some of the “rah rah, girl power” stuff), as it’s more politically useful to present as the unpowered underdog.

anons asks gendpol

Anonymous asked:

There may or may not be a god. We're working on building a few of our own, to neutralise the threat posed by any preexisting gods. We hope to be in a position to withstand any divine hostilities by around 2085, but in the meantime diplomatic and economic countermeasures must make up the balance.

Man, this is a bit too close to some worldbuilding I did where, in the wake of a supervolcano eruption, a bronze-age civilization flipped from being polytheists to being anti-theists.  The Storm the Heavens and Cast Down the Golden Thrones kind of anti-theists, not the internet article writing kind. (A cult expanded in the wake of the catastrophe and became the new religion.)

They are to train over multiple reincarnations for the literal, not metaphorical, battle at the end of time.

Anyhow, the good news is that gluten has been deemed one of their unholy foods.

anons asks mitigated fiction perpendicular wood there's a good bit more to it than that

Anonymous asked:

It's okay to fear death if you don't let that fear control you. We should be pushing the spare capacity for risk we've generated, not resting and letting our potential go to waste. The same applies to any future capacity medical advances generate. To put it in the crudest possible terms, immortality is for pussies. Choose instead to die gloriously.

The grand irony is that all the other medical technologies acquired along the way as part of the general pattern of technological development necessary to achieve enhanced lifespans would very well allow me to achieve much more of my potential.

…to have energy, to have focus, to have executive functioning, for all these to be much less of a battle, why did you think I wanted to live so long in the first place?

There’s a lot of art to make, way more than can be crammed into a single human lifetime, much less a single dysfunctional human lifespan.

The “but living longer will remove meaning from human life!” arguments were always somewhat bizarre to me.  Making a book, or a comic book, or a movie, it takes a long time!

anons asks transhumanism

Anonymous asked:

Other thing that somehow features all three: the Back To The Future trilogy

I admit, I focused on doing time travel, not watching time travel, so I haven’t seen all of them.  It was more of a one-time thing, too.

Actually my knowledge of late 20th century movies is pretty selective.  It was all considered pretty bloody problematic at the time, for most of them.

Anyhow, it’s kinda complicated, but the third way is the most, uh, accurate, I guess?  There’s like a 50-50 chance I’m being chased by the Temporal Enforcement Bureau, but eh, I can live with it.

shtpost anons asks supervillain chronofelony augmented reality break
ranma-official
theonion: “SAN FRANCISCO—In an effort to reduce the number of unprovoked hostile communications on the social media platform, Twitter announced Monday that it had added a red X-mark feature verifying users who are in fact perfectly okay to harass....
theonion

SAN FRANCISCO—In an effort to reduce the number of unprovoked hostile communications on the social media platform, Twitter announced Monday that it had added a red X-mark feature verifying users who are in fact perfectly okay to harass. “This new verification system offers users a simple, efficient way to determine which accounts belong to total pieces of shit whom you should have no qualms about tormenting to your heart’s desire,” said spokesperson Elizabeth James, adding that the small red symbol signifies that Twitter has officially confirmed the identity of a loathsome person who deserves the worst abuse imaginable and who will deliberately have their Mute, Block, and Report options disabled. “When a user sees this symbol, they know they’re dealing with a real asshole who has richly earned whatever mistreatment they receive, including profanity, body-shaming, leaking of personal information, and relentless goading to commit suicide. It’s really just a helpful way of saying to our users, ‘This fuck has it coming, so do your worst with a clear conscience and without fear of having your account suspended.’” At press time, Twitter reassuredly clarified that the red X was just a suggestion and that all users could still be bullied with as little recourse as they are now.

Source: theonion queue
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