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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
rendakuenthusiast
ragemovement

When liberals Constantly use ‘45’, ‘head cheeto’, ‘drumpf’ etc to refer to trump….I’m just like “you know it isn’t like beetlejuice, right”

obiternihili

it’s just the liberal obummer

rendakuenthusiast

It’s exactly as stupid as obummer was. Or for that matter however people made fun of Bush. Or for that matter writing “Micro$oft” with a dollar sign.

mitigatedchaos

It’s such a disgraceful way to refer to our first Meme-American President!

They need to have some cultural respect instead of just dismissing him over his unusually-saturated skin color!

Source: ragemovement shtpost this is a joke
mutant-aesthetic
w-r-o-u-g-h-t

the fact hillary clinton has a children’s book is super creepy honestly

that’s political propaganda

it’s for children

how have i not seen anyone else freaking out about this

moontouched-moogle

Probably because everyone’s too busy laughing and memeing about how awful and blatant it is

mutant-aesthetic

Don’t all political leaders in the US get children’s books? Like, I thought that shit was normal. Hillary’s is only noteworthy because it’s fucking awful.

mitigatedchaos

I’ll be publishing my first children’s book soon.  It’s mostly about Singapore.

Source: w-r-o-u-g-h-t shtpost this is a joke
silver-and-ivory

Anonymous asked:

so let me get this straight. you physically have the dna of two white lesbians yet you still somehow think you're genetically asian?

silver-and-ivory answered:

hon, i’m adopted. from china. it’s. not that hard to figure out.

silver-and-ivory

both lesbians are also cis, i’m pretty sure i’ve said that in the past

cromulentenough

Also like, ‘my parents are both lesbians’ should probably have a bigger prior of ‘adopted’ rather than ‘test tube baby that didn’t require sperm which is theoretically possible but hasn’t ever actually happened yet’.

fuck-planets

The silver lining is that we’ve staffed this corner of Tumblr with so many transhumanists that someone’s brain ACTUALLY supplies “near/mid-future gene-editing technique” before “adoption.”

silver-and-ivory

I mean I’m pretty sure that anon thought that I was Rachel Dolezal: Part Two, Asian Boogaloo; but this is a far more pleasing interpretation. @mitigatedchaos would approve.

mitigatedchaos

Obviously you’re just not signalling being Chinese hard enough.

You’re gonna need to wear a qipao, while putting your hair in a bun and putting two chopsticks through it, while appearing in a kung fu movie set in Hong Kong, while speaking with a heavy Cantonese accent.

This should make it clear to all readers that you are definitely Chinese, despite growing up in America to the point that you tag things as “#half-remembered” and probably having almost no familiarity with speaking Cantonese in your life.

Now I know what you’re thinking.  “But wait, don’t many overseas Chinese students these days speak with an accent almost indistinguishable from American English as spoken by a second-generation immigrant?”  But this is about Tumblr theater for Americans who project their own terrible race politics on every other country, regardless of whether it’s remotely applicable, so spoon feeding is required.

As for the kung fu, that’s merely a point of disagreement between me and the current government on whether learning a martial art should be mandatory for all able-bodied adult citizens as part of a broad-based, multi-layered civil defense strategy.  The good news is that the same viewers don’t know what real martial arts looks like, so you don’t actually have to learn kung fu, at least while the government and I hash out our differences over what qualifies as “an essential obligation of citizenship” and a “necessary sovereign service to be yielded by the state.”

shtpost this is a joke dont take it seriously
argumate
argumate

I suddenly realised I have no idea how to refer to the round objects used in a game of baseball

baseballs? doesn’t sound right

baseball balls? surely not

mitigatedchaos

That’s what they are, Argumate.  One is a baseball, more are baseballs.

“About the size of a baseball.” “He hit a baseball over the fence.”  Etc.

I feel like maybe you don’t belong in America (or Japan).

(Nah I’m just kidding, Japanese would probably use some counter so the plural form wouldn’t be “baseballs” (per se).)

shtpost this is a joke but you'll have to get used to it
argumate
argumate

“Race” is not a biological concept. Someone who looks different from you has the same human genes, just a different grab-bag of dominant traits.

vs.

It is exclusively non-African races, such as white people, who still carry hybrid human/Neanderthal genes.

in the same post.

mitigatedchaos

NEW IDEOLOGY UNLOCKED: NEONEANDETHAL WHITE REVIVALISM + ASIA™

As almost all land was once occupied by the neaderthals, only their closest descendants, such as the White Man, hold the ancestral rights to Earth.

shtpost politics this is a joke

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1Requires support for Text Color by weblog manufacturer.

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shtpost visual shtpost politics the mitigated exhibition this is a joke mostly what even is this blog

Anonymous asked:

But Miti, how are your anons supposed to optimize our asks for creepiness and/or offensiveness if we don't know your race and gender? Won't you think of the anons?

Ugggh.  Who do you think you are, Google?

Come back when you’re a multinational corporation physically embodying the threat of a societal panopticon in order to more efficiently sell Authentic™ skinny mom jeans to hipsters, loser.

anons asks shtpost this is a joke
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